Tips on Customizing Your Vows

Decide whether you will take on writing the vows together or alone.  If writing it alone, you may want to take turns running them by each other before the big day.  Make sure that you both have approximately the same length of text so that one person isn't rambling on for five minutes while the other says ten words.

Discuss what marriage means to you.  Discuss with your fiance important events and turning points in your relationship such as how you met, when you fell in love, when and how you said, "I love you," and any breakups (and make-ups) that you've endured.  List the qualities you most admire in your loved one, and characteristics that he or she brings out in you.  Divulge what marrying really means to you.

Make your vows funny and warm, but not cryptic or embarrassing -- they should reflect the magnitude of the commitment you are about to make. Your vows should not drag on and on.  Be concise and get to the core of what marrying that person means to you.  Eliminate any redundancies or extra words. Save some words for the toast (and the honeymoon night, of course).  Remember, less is oftentimes more.

Be sure to review these with your officiant in advance of your wedding.